An Important Announcement from the Crescent COVID Council

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Opalium

Stay awesome
Joined
Jun 21, 2019
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547
Important Announcement from the Crescent COVID Council
Keeping you safe - the Crescent way.


Attention, Crescent!
This is an official announcement from the newly elected Crescent COVID Council. Please pay close attention to the following statement.

As you surely know by now, the world as a whole is currently in battle with humanity's greatest and most dangerous foe to date. Not a foreign alien species; not an army of sentient AI death machines that we built ourselves; not even a legion of internet weebs after you insult their waifus; We are, of course, speaking of the very deadly and very mysterious COVID-19 pandemic.
This unusual virus has been spreading around the globe faster than anyone could've even imagined, and almost every single country and government in the world has declared some of emergency. The situation is not dire, but also not quite a stroll on the beach.

Much like everywhere else, and in the interest of protecting you, the citizens of our lovely and mostly-peaceful little terrorist settlement, the leadership of Project Crescent has called for the election of a governing body that will take control of the battle against the ongoing plague. In an urgent vote within Team Crescent, with the majority vote consisting of one vote from Founder, CEO, Chairman, General Overlord and Galactic Superstar of Crescent Opalium (veri was asleep at this time, dreaming of C++ pointers), the Crescent leadership has finalized the decision to elect the Crescent COVID Council, headed by and consisting of... well, me.

As the newly elected controlling body of Project Crescent, and as our first steps in combating the virus, we are declaring a new set of rules that will apply until further notice. These rules are all inclusive, and all citizens, visitors, lesser lifeforms (e.g. staff members) in Crescent must comply with them. Remember: these rules were installed for your safety and well-being! Your cooperation is, therefore, mandatory and very important.

The rules are as follows:
  • All inhabitants of the Crescent community must wear protective masks at all times, to ensure they will not infect their environment, nor will be infected by others. Said masks will be provided to you by the CCC administration as soon as possible. The attachment strings are coated with heavy-duty industry-standard superglue to ensure the removal of the mask will not be possible - again, for your safety.
  • All inhabitants of the Crescent community must also wear a pair of protection gloves at all times, for the same reasons described above. Said gloves must also not be removed at any point for any reason, except for the death of the user. The gloves will be provided to you from a third-party vendor, "Crime.net Holdings". They are an industry leader in the area and supply some of the best gloves out there. Do ignore any unusual odors coming from your pair, if such odors exist.
  • All inhabitants of the Crescent community must keep a safety distance of at least two meters (six feet in dumbfuck units) from each other to minimize the infection potential. Remember: the virus is highly contagious, even without physical contact!
  • In the event that an inhabitant of the Crescent community has become infected, said individual must immediately quarantine themselves without further ado and remain in isolation until further notice. Under no circumstances should an infected individual make physical or emotional contact with any other individuals in the community, and especially not attempt to kill other individuals with firearms or any other lethal means, nor attempt to purposely infect them for profit or "the lolz".
  • Due to a severe shortage in Toilet Paper across the entire world, all Toilet Paper within the Crescent community will be confiscated and moved under the control of the CCC. The CCC administration will then provide said Toilet Paper as rations to eligible inhabitants of the community - specifically those that are sick or infected.

All of the above rules are effective immediately. All inhabitants of Crescent, and especially the participants in the popular activity often named "Tee tee tee", are required to follow them closely and obey all further instructions from The CCC administration.

CAUTION: The CCC or its administration are not responsible for any harm, damage, or death of inhabitants who did not follow the above rules and were therefore infected. Any infected individual will be recorded as breaking one or more of the above rules, and will no longer be eligible to any rewards, refunds or basic medical attention. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

On behalf of the CCC administration, I'd like to thank you for your cooperation and trust in our organization. You, the people of Crescent, have placed your faith in the trusty and not-corrupted-at-all hands of the CCC group, and you have our corporate word that we will not breach this trust between us - especially not through the means of supporting various groups of traitorous individuals within the community that seek to eliminate the rest of the peaceful terrorist population.

Kind regards, and many thanks for your time.

Signed,
Dr. Opalium Abusius, PhD in all the things
Chairman, CEO, and generally bossy person
Crescent COVID Council - "If we can't fight it with guns, we'll fight it with panic!"





In other news:
  • The missing textures in Skycraft Final and Wrestling have been fixed.
  • Fixed a bug where the physical name plate for some weapons would be positioned incorrectly and just float in the center of your view. No, you aren't seeing things. Yet.
  • Fixed a bug where Legendary Effects sometimes still showed even after disabling them.
  • Added !taunt as a chat command that plays your equipped taunt (in addition to the console command 'crescent_taunt').
  • Temporarily removed the golf cart in Al's Toy Barn while we look into possible solutions to the delay problems it causes.
  • Bombastic damage and area of effect have been reduced.
  • The remaining content from the Enhancement update is still being worked on. Apologies! The pandemic has really thrown our schedules off the rails, unfortunately.